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Friday, January 04, 2008

Synopsis of Countdown #17 (Spoilers)



"Barrrrrrrry!!!!"

Kathooom!

Brokk!

Croooom!

"Jeann!!!"

Sssszzzzzark!

"Shazam!"

Booooooom!!

Fssssssssshhhh!!

"This can't be happening!"

"Nooooooooo!!!!"

"Ray! Look out!"

Fzzzzzzark!

"Rayner!"

Thuk!

"What?"

Fraaaakkk!!

"See how the multiverse corrupts us all?"

"The Monarch!"

"Oh, snap!"

14 comments:

  1. An amazingly apt recap.

    The reveal of Bob as being evil might've been interesting. The follow-up on it has just been confusion and crap.

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  2. Yup, that about sums it all up. And quite neatly.

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  3. Like I'm saying, the Big Two should just stop trying to tell stories and leave the storytelling up to Hollywood. The Big Two should just become solely IP farms and just focus on licensing their IPs out.

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  4. Because...movies are the great refuge of storytelling? What?

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  5. They still publish this turkey?

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  6. Mordicai,

    Movies are a Hell of a lot better than Spidey making deals with Satan to avoid life, or long, drawn out, weekly stories where the writers forget their points and a study into homophobia turn into a buddy story with lots of gay bashing.

    Seriously though, Batman Begins, Spider-Man 1 & 2, and even Blade were all better than the stuff currently being published.

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  7. Kevin: Go and read some Blue Beetle. It'll make everything better. ^_^

    And, why are they killing off all the happyhappy heroes? Does DC just hate story possibilities, or something?

    Plus: The 'Shazam!' panel is a slashfic just waiting to happen.

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  8. Recap of this blog:

    "Florrrrp"

    "Riiiiiiip"

    "Ouch, my privates!"

    "Damn you, DC!!!"

    "Splatttt"

    "Schlickkkk"

    "Damn you, Dan DiDio!"

    "Hurrrrrrrr!"

    "Is that chemo?"

    "Sexismmmm!!!!!"

    "Arrrghhh"

    "Joey!!"

    "Blorrrttt"

    "LOL, Countdown!"

    dun DUN DUNNNNNN

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  9. John, you forgot about the joke about the guy who continuously complained about a blog but for some inexplicable reason kept reading it. Was it masochism? Boredom? A need to to stir up controversy to make a name for himself? Or was it simply the need for community -- a basic, primal need that every human being possesses? We might never know. Because every comment he posted since that had insulting content was deleted.

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  10. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

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  11. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

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  12. Kenny- pointing out stinkers like OMD & Countdown is all well & good, but I could point at plenty of movies (Steel? My Super Ex-Girlfriend? &c) that are just as awful. Heck, don't try to talk me into defending OMD: I agree the story sucks. I don't see the movies doing anything nearly as interesting as All-Star Supes or Iron Fist or anything GOOD coming out. I mean, what innovation is there in the movies? A Flavor-of-the-week girlfriend for Bats? A poorly conceived kid for Superman to be a deadbeat dad for? HOORAY!

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  13. Modicai - While many movies fail, and fail spectacularly, at least the creators involved give a shit about what they're making. Comic book companies clearly don't anymore. They're just producing periodicals to both keep their IPs valid and suck off whatever dollar they can from the aging fanboy market. That someone with actual talent like a Brubaker or Fraction actually sneaks in is more a product of probability than it is of trying to find good writing talent. As far as I'm concerned, 99% of mainstream superhero comics suck and suck badly and I'm not about to go spend hundreds of dollars to go find 4 or 5 more good ones.

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  14. Just so you know... I spit my coke a bit when I read this post. Haven't done that in YEARS.

    Thank you.

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