Wednesday, May 27, 2009

Oh Archie, You Cad!

Sorry, Betty.

I hope they don't get married on Harper's Island.


  1. Oh come on. Give Andrews some credit. He's marrying for strictly for the money here. He'll give it a year, then divorce Veronica, take half the Lodge estate (as established in the pre-nuptial agreement devised by his shark lawyer), then fly off to the Caman Islands with Betty and Cheryl. The guy had two girls all up in his grill for years whilst rocking a bow tie. You can't tell me he's not clever like a fox.


  2. Anonymous1:10 PM

    Of course he's going to marry Veronica. That woman is LOADED! Don't sign that prenup, Archie! I still held out hope for Betty, though.

  3. Did NO ONE see the big display Archie Comics had at NYCC?!? Archie is getting married, and not a single mention on the blogosphere or internets. *SIGH*

    Starting with #600, Archie will marry Veronica in a three-issue future "what if" story. Starting with #603, we'll see the "what if" scenario with Betty.

    No idea what's planned for Archie Comics #666. (Walt Disney Comics and Stories holds the award for best use of that number.)

    (And if you don't like either scenario, go watch "Return to Riverdale" (or read the John Byrne adaptation).)

  4. "And that's how the comics industry finally decided they didn't need readers anymore."


    "And that's how Archie Comics came to appropriate the 'Goodman Goes Playboy' satire from Kurtzman and Elder into their regular series."

  5. Hurgh. I must learn to proofread before I post.

    On a less silly note, I have to wonder why Archie Comics are pulling this move now? Will it be an imaginary story? A dream? Something else? Will this storyline spin into an older Archie title? I mean, they've made him younger in the L'il Archie books. . .

    Of course, this is all window dressing for the inevitable PUREHEART RETURNS storyline. Because the only thing that beats a wedding is a superhero wedding. Married superheroes in healthy relationships are a sure-fire editorial hit. /snark

  6. Hah, I think I must be the only one who got the Harper's Island comment. My wife watches that show, it is even worse than Jericho :)

    As for Archie. Genius! Marry Veronica for the cash, and keep Betty on the side for fun.

    Nicely played!

  7. I remember those Christian Archie comics from when I was a kid. Maybe they can do a Church of Latter Day Saints version where Archie marries Veronica AND Betty AND Cheryl.

  8. Anonymous5:40 PM

    Wait, they're waiting another 100 issues to get married?

    I picked a bad time to start up on Archie.

  9. Wait, aren't they still in high school in the comics?

  10. Oh Archie..that low graid point average of his finally paid off. Always smart to go with the ball busting bitch over the devoted girl that suports you and is ten times as sexy. Far as I am concerned you are DEAD TO ME Archie. Enjoy your bonding time with Jughead which should be YOUR new nick name.

  11. Actually, what's really shocking to me is the sight of Jughead wearing a sports jacket. And still wearing the hat.

  12. Anonymous10:37 AM

    Swear to god I thought this was a hoax, and even now I'm not completely sure...

  13. Anonymous1:26 PM

    In my twisted mind, I'm thinking Betty's sad because Veronica will no longer be available for those, uh, sleepovers. That's what we're calling them now, right?

  14. I heard about it and hated it. Not the idea of his getting married, but VERONICA?! She's a spoiled effing bitch! I don't even know how anyone was even FRIENDS with her!

    Now Betty...goddamn, Betty is where it's at! Archie is a damned fool.

    Heh I'm really not as passionate about the subject as I sounded just there, but in honesty Betty > Veronica easily.