Occasional Links: The Steampunk Parademon Edition

Man of Steel, Woman of Kleenex

When I was a teenager I got a big kick of this essay by Larry Niven that imagines what would happen if Superman really had sex with a mortal woman -- you know, from a physics standpoint:

"The purpose of this article is to point out some medical drawbacks to being a kryptonian among human beings, and to suggest possible solutions."

Today, not rocking on it quite so much.

But worth a read. (NSFW, obviously)


The Trouble With Harry


Your Mom's Basement asks Marvel editor Tom Breevort ten questions designed to clarify Harry Osborn's new place in the post-OMD universe:

4. Does Normie Osborn still exist?
Yes.

...this and other revelations at the link!


The Most Important Review You'll Ever Read!Look, I understand 400 reviews on Amazon.com for the latest Harry Potter book.

But a Bic ballpoint pen?

Since taking delivery of my pen I have been very happy with the quality of ink deposition on the various types of paper that I have used. On the first day when I excitedly unwrapped my pen (thanks for the high quality packaging Amazon!) I just couldn't contain my excitement and went around finding things to write on, like the shopping list on the notice board in our kitchen, the Post-it notes next to the phone, and on my favourite lined A4 pad at the side of my desk.

SWAYZE


The true story. In panels and art.

(found at Journalista)


Steampunk Fourth World Action Figures

Courtesy of The Fwoosh are these awesome custom action figures of Kirby's Fourth World characters reimagined as steampunk characters:


PS: All those Fourth World characters gonna die. But they live on in your action figures.



Video: And now, here's the opening to a Superman cartoon for the 1980s...with John Williams score!

It's Hard To Dislike "Death Of The New Gods"

Why? Because it's Jim Starlin. DC really dodged the bullet on this whole miniseries by getting Starlin to write and draw it. Because it's like if you put Marv Wolfman & George Perez on Countdown -- yeah, it's another editorially-mandated clusterf**k but how can you dislike it when you've got such legendary creators on it? It would be like hating Stan Lee. Which is like hating Comics. There's some math in there.

If you're familiar with Starlin's work with characters like Captain Marvel or Warlock at all, you understand that this guy's a master of the Cosmic Story -- probably right behind Kirby in that regard. So if you get bogged down or confused by metaphysical/galactic sentences like:

"They'd actually taken the Source's cryptic meanderings and sculpted them into the foundation of a ridiculous little religious fantasy,"

rest assured that it all has some higher spiritual purpose and that God will probably make an appearance in the third act, even if He is in the form of a section of drywall or a Nerf ball with Kirby crackle emanating from it.

Because the mini is called "The Death of the New Gods," a big portion of the suspense and emotional impact is taken away because you're poised to expect DEATH. In fact, if the # of deaths don't total at least three each issue, one might almost feel disappointed.

That all said, I can only imagine what die-hard Kirby fans must be thinking when they read this book. It's like if you were a die-hard Buffy fan and you watching a TV movie called "The Death of All the Buffy Characters."

In that sense, this book is both a tribute and a slightly patronizing "farewell to thee" to Kirby's legacy at DC. Further, I see Death of the New Gods as an interesting companion to Marvel's recent Elementals mini. The two publishers, faced with these uniquely "Jack Kirby" characters and worlds, have gone and used two different approaches with them -- one, to put Neil Gaiman on the job and make it all pretty, and the other, to perform radical and fatal "heart surgery" on the cast.

Which begs the question: is the Fourth World saga - and Jack Kirby's bombastic creations in general -- old-fashioned and dated in comparison with comics today? I dunno. Ask George Lucas.

Fangirl Fridays: The Wonder Woman Camisole Edition

( image found on this "Goddamn Batman" thread)

Welcome to Fangirl Fridays, The Preeminent Something Of Comics Something-Something

Wearing The Wonder Woman Cami

Okay, so yesterday I decided to wear my Wonder Woman camisole with a fancy jacket.

"Camisole" is a fancy way of saying "one half of a pair of WW Underoos." But it's a tank top, basically.

To back up:

My BF had surprised me with this set a few weeks ago:

The details of which is another post entirely. Suffice to say he owned a pair of Superman briefs and leave it at that.

But anyway, the whole ensemble I wore yesterday was very tasteful -- no belly, no boobage. No, I didn't wear the underpants outside, I had jeans, boots. Not outwardly sexy at all.

But I got stared at from the very moment I left the apartment.

And people would stop me in the middle of the street and go:

"Wonder Woman! It's Wonder Woman!"

I s**t you not.

I had middle-aged accountant-types doing the Lynda Carter costume-change twirl.

I had groups of twenty-somethings of both genders stop and scream out:

"Go, Wonder Woman!"

More restrained onlookers said with a restrained air of fanboy cultivation:

"Nice shirt."

Of course, I had to wait for my BF in front of a comic shop -- so this only got worse.

Now as I said before, there was no boobage involved -- the camisole was a little baggy and between that and the jacket there was not a lot of cleavage or skin or anything. Very plain.

But I think it's the magnetic quality of that "WW" icon -- the colors, the symbol, everything -- that draws people. It's instantly recognizable. It provokes a reaction. It's like the Superman & Batman symbol.

Which is why I think a well-executed Wonder Woman comic, movie, or TV series would be a huge success. The appeal is being seriously underestimated.


"Honey, I'm Home!"

"Laws of Editorially-Driven Content" #458:

When starting a "universe-shattering" & "relevant" mini-series event, have the first issue end with the husband coming home to find the wife dead amongst the now-ironic detritus of their once-idyllic domestic life. It's kind of a cheap shot, but it does keep them coming back for seconds.



"And also, people don’t like cats, so it gets a bit more of a pass. Most people reading New Avengers are dog people. "

--Brian Michael Bendis on the "Tigra Beatdown" scene in New Avengers #35
(via Expertologist)

"Strip Search Sally" And Other Halloween Options For The Ladies

Comics Fairplay posted this list of the top women's Halloween costumes according to Halloweenmart.com:

1. Referee
2. Jail Bait
3. Gothic Black Fairy
4. Lacy Pirate
5. Strip Search Sally
6. Bohemian Go Go Girl
7. Shimmer Witch
8. Gangster Moll
9. Geisha
10. Vixen Pirate Wench

Now I have to admit, "Referee" was rather encouraging because that's an occupation of some power and skill. See, you can be:

Plain old Referee

Sexy Referee

or "Playboy Style" Referee

Of course, it also should be noted that nobody is putting a gun to these women's heads to buy this stuff. (Well, I did hear somebody out a gun to Tigra's head, but...)


Pop Candy Meet-Up In NYC Yesterday

Attended a NYC meet-up for Whitney Matheson's Pop Candy blog on USA Today.com. Pizza was served and a good time was had by all.

Hey, if I throw one of these meet-up shindigs, anybody interested?


David Chase, Just Shut Up


The "Sopranos" creator expounds further on "that ending," hinting that Tony really didn't die. In the process, he manages to put down the fans of his show once again, comparing them to a bunch of "pathetic" barbaric individuals who love violence and bloodshed.

You know, I'm so sorry the rabid fanbase for the show doesn't quite match Chase's highbrow fantasies, but they are fans and they buy the DVDs and have been loyal and kept him quite wealthy so why not just suck it up? Yeah, I know you're an artiste but have a modicum of gratefulness.


"Smallville" Last Night

Was that "Smallville" or "Hostel 2"?


Dean Cain is still looking good though. Tho not as good as Waxy Colin:

That's all we have for this edition of "Fangirl Fridays." Y'all have an excellent weekend. I know I will.

Almost Peed My Pants Reading This - SPOILERS

DC can use that as a pull-quote for the trade for "Death of New Gods" --

"Almost Peed My Pants Reading This"

--Occasional Superheroine

Ah. Well.

Follow this link for the spoilers, last page, and then come back here.

The "honey, I'm home...and you're dead" trope is getting rawther tired, isn't it? Didn't I read this book three years ago?

Anyways, cue the "Fridge Squad" blogger protest in five...four...three...two...

(though to be fair, the title is "Death of New Gods," right?)

Fangirl Fridays

Good morning! My neck really hurts because I did the salon thing; they baked my hair for an hour, washed it like 10 times. Patient boyfriend waiting for TWO HOURS in the salon, thumbing through their fashion magazines, torture.

Is Vogue More Sexist Than Adam Hughes Covers?

Patient boyfriend, after reading every women's magazine in the salon, inquires:

"How come there is such feminist uproar specifically over comic books when these magazines also show idealized, often skimpily-dressed women on a regular basis? I mean, any number of these blond models could be Ms. Marvel."

I, of course, was quick with an answer:

"Well, the purpose of cheesecake comics is the boobies, the purpose of Vogue and In Style is to make me feel like I'm not living up to an artifical standard thus propelling me to buy more stuff."

It's a good question, though. And of course I'm answering this as I'm paying through the nose to get my hair done.

This Week At The Comics Shop

I didn't go to my usual comics shop yesterday so I'm sure I've overlooked some issues...

New Green Lantern Issue: nice, but there's no urgency there. Oh, Hal and Kyle/Parallax are going to mix it up! Wow, didn't see that coming! Oooh, will one of them die? No?

Alternate cover for Flash #13: It takes a lot of balls to put out "collector's covers" for a book of this quality.

Punisher #49: Here's a new one: breast cancer instead of rape for a female character's motivation. Bought this, haven't read it yet. Opened it up on the train, faced with naked woman w/one breast covered in blood shooting the face off another guy while everyone is naked and covered with blood. Punisher naked handcuffed to bed while said woman climbs on top of him and asks him to "f**k" her and then blows her own brains out. Yes, the streets are tough.

Countdown: Probably would help sales if Wizard wouldn't reveal everything that happens that day.

Deadpool/GLI: No, the present isn't safe for you, Squirrel Girl & Speedball. Dan Slott has to seriously think of a way to protect Squirrel Girl so she doesn't become the next Sue Dibny. Speedball, Sue, then possibly ripping Jimmy Olsen's intestines out through his nose -- no square character is safe!

Putting The New Gods Out Of Their Misery

What happens to the quaint properties of yesteryear after several revivals have failed?

Well, you could hire Neil Gaiman and John Romita Jr. to do a mini-series.

Or you could ask Jim Starlin to kill them and reboot them all.

A Wildstorm "revival" of some of the New Gods characters was on the docket while I was still working at DC. One or two involved artists that would in theory take such a long time to finish an arc that conceivably there might even be a finished issue or two ready to roll.

These revivals seemed to me to be more like Morrison-esque reinterpretations rather than wholesale reboots. However, the gist I've gotten from Starlin's Newsarama interview is that there are going to be reboots.

I don't think inventing whole new character concepts based on the original New Gods names is in itself a bad idea. But based on several recent DC reboots I am a little skeptical.

Then there is the whole question if killing off all the New Gods and rebooting them is disrespectful of the memory of Jack Kirby. And there is the whole question as to whether factoring in such a consideration is the publisher's job, since they own the properties and can do whatever the hell they want.

Zuda, Zudes, Zudons, Zudez, Zudent

Speaking of companies owning properties, I've been pondering this Zuda comics initiative.

I don't think we can really know what Zuda is about and if it is going to work or not until it actually gets launched. I'm reserving judgements until such time.

However.

All the internet commentary on the subject brings up the larger issue of work-for-hire and creator rights.

Tom Spurgeon brought up the point that no matter how above-board DC is, no matter how "informed" the creators are about what they are getting themselves into, it is still ethically wrong to ask a creator to sign away their rights to an artistic work.

Another point-of-view would be that without the economic incentive of aquiring intellectual properties, there is no reason for a big company like DC or Marvel to waste their time. That to ask these publishers to allow creators to hold on to the rights is to ask them to do something out of an ethical, not business, motivation.

This brings me to something I noticed yesterday when I was getting my hair done.

The neighborhood was pretty posh, and most of the boutiques there were these overly-priced tourist traps that offer discount-quality clothing for inflated prices. There was only one boutique there that had decent prices. It was run by an affable, down-to-earth lady who believed in offering fair prices for quality goods. She was from California, a little bit of a hippie, and completely contrasted with the elegant but cold Euro-shops that dotted the block.

I bought a really good peacoat from that woman last fall for a great price.

She's gone now, replaced by another inflated-priced Euro-shop tourist trap. As I knew she would be when I bought that awesome coat.

It's a great coat.


Teh Internets, They Are Teh Dead

Man, between the Summer Vacation & the pre-San Diego Con festivities, the internet is *dead*!


Me me me me me me me me pimpage me

I've got a big(ish) announcement at the beginning of next week. Just another chapter of my interesting life in comics -- be there!

DC's "New Gods" Plans

From Newsarama's interview with Jim Starlin re: upcoming "Death of the New Gods" mini:

NRAMA: If the end is nigh for the New Gods, where do Darkseid and Apokolips weigh in? Or are they in danger as well?

JS: I'm not sure why folks keep asking me questions like this. The name of the series is The Death of the New Gods, not The Death of Some of the New Gods.

NRAMA: Got it. Finally, then, will this project lead to a re-iteration of the New Gods in the foreseeable future? Or do you think it is time to close the final chapter on an old idea and try a new concept?

JS: DC owns the rights to the character's names. There's some great names there. What do you think?

Are they going to reboot these characters a la "Blue Beetle" "Atom" etc with the classic names and all-new people?

Quick, somebody run to the John Byrne boards and elicit his reaction!